dog show

It's Thanksgiving, the dog show is on, in a few hours I'll be sitting around a table surrounded by my family staring at a giant dead bird, they will ask me what I'm thankful for and I won't know what to say. I've been stuck in a very dark place the past few months and I don't know how to save myself and it scares me. Every day I suppress this sadness, I'm really good at pretending everything is okay, but when I have any down time all the feelings I've been trying desperately to keep at bay come out in a shitstorm of tears and fury, maybe I'm unstable and weird but I think I'm finally ready to admit that I need help.